Wrens World: 2015

So in my life update a while back I talked about starting my own makeup brand. It's something I really want to do but I've decided to put it off for a while. It might be a few months or a few years or maybe never. Right now I'm just THINKING about it. I'm focusing more on college right now. I haven't boughten anything to start making products, I'm just pondering the idea of having my own brand and what I'd start with. Plus a friend of mine wants me to join Mary Kay, which might be a good idea. I mean I'd have to sell products for a different brand but it would help with my business skills and I could see what people do and don't like in certain products. Yes, it wouldn't be MY products but it would give me an idea of what qualities people like and want in their makeup. But I'm not sure if Mary Kay is a brand I want to be a part of. Their products are decent but that's it. They're priced like a high end brand you would buy at Sephora but the quality and formulas of a lot of their products is not good. I could get a lot more, and a lot better, products at the drugstore rather than them for the most part (I haven't tried everything from them, I'm just going off of what I have tried). Well that turned into a mini rant. They're stuff is good but I just think it's overpriced, especially since I've tried so many different high end brands. If I'm going to pay $8 for a 0.05 oz eyeshadow I expect it to be good quality(a MAC eyeshadow is $10 for 0.04 oz for reference). But I'm sure if I try more I'll find more things that I love. I honestly haven't tried that much, just a handful of eyeshadows, some lipsticks, and different kinds of foundations/bb creams. Now back to what this post is really about, me starting my own brand someday. Mary Kay would give me good business and people skills but I don't know how that would look later. You start with your own Mary Kay business but then stop that and start your own indie brand? I feel like people might try to accuse me of stealing their products, ideas, formula, etc. Maybe I'm just being paranoid. It would help me gain experience but would it hurt me in the long run? I'm going to say this now, if I ever start my own brand it will be mine. I'll create my own products and formulas. I'll spend months, maybe even years, creating my own perfect range of cosmetics. If I'm going to put in the time and effort AND put my name and face to a brand then it will be completely me. Sure if I grow I'll hire people to help me but I'll always be the one in charge, making the decisions. Talking about this is getting me excited. No, not for the power, but for having my own brand where I get to make my own makeup! I don't really know if owning my own makeup brand will ever happen. I love so many other brands so I wouldn't only use what I make. Creating my own makeup brand and products is just something I dream of, but not all dreams come true or can be a reality. I dreamt of being a singer when I was younger but then I realized my voice isn't as good as I thought so it just won't happen. But if you guys think I should try to pursue this, even if it takes me 20 years, let me know. I'd also love to know what specifically you like most in your makeup i.e. longevity of wear, pigmentation, feel, scent, etc. (tell me something like "I like my lipsticks matte but not drying, to last at least 10 hours, be smudge-proof, and smell like cupcakes" or "I love highly pigmented eyeshadow with little fall out that doesn't smell like anything" and so on) I know I rambled on and was all over the place but I'm just typing what I'm thinking. Hopefully you've been able to understand what I'm talking about and not get too lost or confused. Thank you so much for all your love, support, and ideas.

xoxo,
Wren

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So, after a lot of thinking I've narrowed it down to a few different majors for college. I'm still super indecisive so I might end up doing something totally different. I don't know if I've ever mentioned it before but I've always been fascinated with sharks and all other marine life so I've thought about majoring in marine biology. The only thing is that I wasn't that great at biology in high school. But at the same time it's something I like so even if I wasn't that at it, it might me worth it to go after. Now as I'm writing this I'm starting to consider it too. Damn, I need to make up my mind. As for graphic design, I've always loved animated movies and design so an animation degree would be great. I said graphic design because I found a college nearby me that has a degree that is offered online or on campus that is graphic design with a specialization on animation and motion graphics. I would probably get my associates through them and then transfer to a 4 year university and get a bachelors degree in animation. The other option is cosmetology. I've always love makeup and liked hair a lot but I'm just not sure about it. Mainly because the college I go to has the most HIDEOUS uniforms you have to wear and the salon is a blast from the past, it literally looks like you took a time machine to 1980 and then went into a salon. I know it's so superficial and snobby but it's just all so ugly and dated. It's like my OCD and interior designer in me wants to redo everything. Plus I've seen what 99.9999% of the rest of cosmetology students get to wear, what they want as long as it's black or white. You get to be fashionable while learning something you're passionate about. I've also really been into fashion lately so I've kind of considered maybe doing fashion design but it's more just a hobby as of right now. As for interior design, I'm still really interested in it and haven't ruled it out completely but I'm more interested in animation or cosmetology right now. Every few months I swear I change my mind on what I want to do with my life. I think I won't really know until I actually start learning one more in depth. Like I took a computer graphics course in high school and really liked it and I've done peoples hair and makeup for stuff like homecoming and prom and I cut my own hair most of the time but I've never learned the proper way. I don't know, sometimes I just wish someone would tell me 'Here, this is what you're going to study and do for a living. It's something you'll be successful at but also enjoy.' If only life were that simple and easy. But hey, free will is great and I'm so grateful that I live in somewhere that I can do whatever I want and don't have to be forced into anything. I was more saying it'd just be easier for me at this point since I can't make my mind up. Wow, that turned into an interesting rant. Anyway, I'm starting to figure out things that I'm really passionate about and what I might enjoy doing for a living. I may decide something and then switch majors but in the end I know I'll choose the right thing and be happy. If you have any advice or just want to share your experience when deciding major, let me know down below, I'd love to know.

xoxo,

Wren

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So recently it came out that Facebook will be getting a dislike button. There has been so much controversy about it that I had to add my input. While Facebook creator Mark Zuckerberg has said that it isn't intended to spread hate, that's it's just there for people to voice their opinions... It's total bull. Why would you create or add something thats entire purpose is to show you don't like something or someone? I understand that people should be able to show things they do and don't like but there are better ways, in my opinion. If you don't like a company, you can review it to voice your opinion. If you don't like a public figure you can comment or message them. But why should we have something that will just make people feel like crap? So many 'regular' people get bullied through FaceBook already, adding a dislike button will just give bullies another way to be cruel. It's one thing to review a product or your experience with a company, but to just dislike someones picture or post... As someone who has been bullied and struggles with anxiety and depression I know that this is not going to be a good thing. Say I post a picture of myself where I think I look nice and I'm proud of it and get 2 likes but 7 dislikes. How shitty do you think that would make me feel? How would that make YOU feel? I think the IDEA of a dislike button is good but I know that it will just be abused and used for more harm than good. It's so highly requested and I don't know why. Why would you want to go around spreading hate? Some people say they'd use as a way to show sympathy and empathy like if you posted about a family members death or a crisis. I understand how that would be nice but couldn't you just do that in a comment like you have to now? I posted on mine when my grandfather passed away and it got likes on it but I know it's their way of saying their sorry for my loss and some commented that. Who would actually LIKE that you had a death in your family? I mean, it's just common sense to me. The good news however is that it hasn't been guaranteed to actually come to FaceBook, it's still in the works. I personally don't think it's something that should ever come but it's not up to me. If it does come I really hope that it will be restricted in some way so that it can't be used to bully people or that people use it kindly and responsibly.
I'd love to hear your opinion on this topic. What do you think people will really use it for?

xoxo,
Wren

Note:
I did my research from many news reports to come up with my own opinion but not everything may be factual or correct.

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Above is my most recent YouTube video. I show you my most recent go to makeup look. It's super simple, easy, and moderately natural (a bit bold but using neutral colors for the eyes) For a more detailed, step-by-step tutorial with close up product shots and swatches keep reading!

To start off I used my 'Baby Skin' face primer from Maybelline New York. With a small amount, I used my finger tips to apply it all over my face so that the rest of my makeup has a nice base to start with. I've used this a few times and I don't really like it. I have quite large pores and it does nothing for them. Am I supposed to let it set or something? A lot of over beauty gurus have used this and love it but I guess I'll just have to continue on my search for something to minimize my pores. Maybe I need to change my skin care routine to focus on my pores more? If you have any product suggestion, makeup or skin care, PLEASE let me know!

I next apply my Maybelline 'Fit Me' concealer in 15 Fair in a triangular shape under my eyes to cover any dark circles. This shade is really great because it's close enough to my skin shade that it doesn't highlight much so it can still be used on spots!

My skin likes to be nice and red, especially around my nose, so to cover it up I turn to my Coastal Scents 'Eclipse Palette' and use the green shade. Green is opposite red on the color wheel so they cancel each other out. I apply this all around my nose and a bit on my chin since I get a bit red there sometimes too. I lightly blended them together with my fingertips but then brought in my Sigma F80 Flat Kabuki brush to blend it even more and better. Then I go back to my Maybelline 'Fit Me' Concealer in 15 Fair to highlight a bit down the bridge of my nose, cheekbones, and forehead and then use my F80 to blend those in a bit.

Heading back to my trusty 'Eclipse Palette' from Coastal Scents, I use the darkest shade to contour. I slowly apply little by little in the hollows of my cheeks, the sides of my nose, around my temples, and at my hairline. You don't want to apply too much if you're super pale like me so that's why I take a while and apply a small amount and build it up. To apply it I used my Sigma F75 Concealer brush. It's the perfect size for me, not too big, but not too small. I also go back in with my Maybelline 'Fit Me' concealer on the sides of my nose and down the bridge because I blended it out a bit too far but its an easy fix. Just add a bit of the 'Fit Me' concealer and blend it out to get the perfect contour.

To set and deepen the contour, I go in with my NYC 'Smooth Skin Bronzer' in Sunny on my Sigma F05 Small Contour brush. I absolutely LOVE this brush! It is so perfect for contouring. It fits in the hollows of my cheeks so well and it's small size lets you contour your nose and around your face all in one brush! Anywho, I used this everywhere I put the dark cream concealer and also on my jawline.

I honestly don't know what I did without this blush. It is my go to, number one blush from NYX called 'Bourgeois Pig'. I have others but this is ALWAYS the one I grab. It's so pigmented but very build-able. If you use it lightly, like I show in the swatch above, it's a nice natural flush of color. Whereas if you apply it a bit more heavily you'll get a more dramatic affect. For this particular look I lightly applied it with my Sigma F10 Powder/Blush brush. I apply my blush from the apples of my cheeks back to my hairline. I don't like the look of blush when it's just on the apples of the cheeks.

To set the rest of my face, and tone down the blush that I applied a bit too heavily, I use my Rimmel 'Stay Matte' Pressed Powder in 003 Natural. To apply it I use my Sigma F30 Large Powder brush. I swirl the brush around in the product and then lightly press in onto my face and then blend it out.

To highlight I've been using this amazing backed eyeshadow from Klean Color called 'Pearl'. It's the perfect silvery white color. Most actual face highlighters are either pink or yellow toned but I don't like how those look on me personally. I apply this with my e.l.f. Fan Brush along my cheekbones, down the bridge of my nose, a bit on the forehead and chin, and on my cupid's bow.

To lightly fill in my brows I used my 'Brows Now!' by Hard Candy in medium/dark. I ran the product through both of my brows to add a bit of color and to fill in sparse areas. I was going for a natural brow, plus I'm almost out, so I didn't apply a ton, just enough to boost the look. This product is really cool because it has little fibers in it that help give you brows a fuller look and feel.

To give the eyeshadows a good base, I use a small amount of Hard Candy's Eye Shadow Primer called "Eyes The Limit." I've used this for a while and it's pretty good. It keeps the eye shadow in place all day, plus it's only $6. Unfortunately, you can only get Hard Candy at Walmart.

Using my Sigma E55 Eye Shading brush, I applied Last Sin from the Urban Decay Vice 3 palette all over the lid. The photos make it look a bit yellow/orange toned but it's a more of a creamy nude.

Next, I take DTF on my Sigma E25 Blending brush and apply it through my crease and outer 'v'. DTF is what I would call a semi-matte finish. It's matte with small flecks of glitter/shimmer. It's not pure shimmer or pure matte. It looks really shimmery in the pan but when you look at the swatch you can see that the glitter/shimmer doesn't transfer. Then I go back with Last Sin on the center of my lid with my finger to bring back some of the color that was lost from adding DTF.

To add depth to the outer 'v' I use Defy on my Sigma E45 Small Tapered Blending brush. I don't blend it out, I just pat it on.

I next take Truth on my Sigma E35 Tapered Blending brush. I start by running it across my brow bone as a highlight and then use it to blend out DTF and Defy. It's very close to my skin color, just a bit more pink toned. I don't use much so that it doesn't lighten the other colors.

Going back to Defy, I use my Sigma E30 Pencil brush to smoke out the bottom lash line. I start by first adding a bit more to the upper lids outer 'v' and then bring it down onto the outermost part of the lower lid. I pull the color inward from so that it creates a gradient effect.

I don't have a picture of what I used next, mainly because it was a sample but also because you can barely read the writing on it. I applied Mary Kay's Ultimate Mascara in black on my top lashes only.

I always use multiple mascaras so next I take Wet 'n Wild's Mega Volume in black on my top and bottom lashes. I used to use this a couple years ago and LOVED it so I recently repurchased it since I was in need of a new mascara, plus it's only $3. Some people don't like it and they've said it didn't do much for their lashes. I have naturally long lashes so it works great on me. If you've ever used this let me know what you thought of it, I'd love to know.

When I repurchased the Mega Volume I saw Wet 'n Wild's Max Volume Plus in black and decided to give it a go. I applied it to my top and bottom lashes. I'm not sure how I feel about this yet.

Taking my baked eye shadow in Pearl from Klean Color on my Sigma E30 Pencil brush and applied it to the inner corner to highlight and brighten.

Now finally on to the lips! I take a tiny amount of my Nivea Lip Butter in Raspberry Rose Kiss on my finger and rub it in to moisturize and soften my lips in preparation for the lipstick.

Taking Klean Colors Kleanista lipstick called 'Cast of Spell' I apply it straight from the tube all over my lips.

Next I take Revlon's 'Cocoa Craving' and Wet 'n Wild's 'Pagan Angel' from their Fergie line on my Sigma E05 Eyeliner brush. I add a tiny amount at a time and blend them together to create the final look.

Heading back to my 'Eclipse Palette' from Coastal Scents, I take the lightest skin color on my Sigma F70 Concealer brush and use it to clean up the edges around my lips to give it a sharp, clean look.

And that's it! We're finally done. I hope you enjoy this look. I love the lip combo I created and the eye look is a great look for any and every one. Let me know what you think of this look and what you'd like to see next! I love to hear your opinions :)

xoxo,

Wren

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As I said in a couple post previous, I talked about studying abroad and trying to figure out what I want to do with my life. I've still been researching universities but I've also recently looked into au pairing for a few months or even a year. Like I said before I've always wanted to travel and see the world. What better way to do it than move and work there?! I would get to see more of the world but would also have a job so I could stay financially secure. For those of you who don't know what an au pair is, it's basically just a fancy name for a live in nanny but they are from a different country. Or as wikipedia states "An au pair (plural: au pairs) is a domestic assistant from a foreign country working for, and living as part of, a host family. Typically, au pairs take on a share of the family's responsibility for childcare as well as some housework, and receive a monetary allowance for personal use." Basically it's kinda perfect for me. I love kids and I want to see the world and by living with a host family I wouldn't have to worry about finding a place to stay or a job since you get payed. There are a few different programs I've been looking into that help place au pairs with a host family but I'll have a fully detailed post/review up once I learn more and hear back from some of the places. A lot of research should be done. I found one that I thought was PERFECT but then I found a long article about a lot of customers and employees saying they over charge you and/or the small print contradicts what the employees say ie 'You're guaranteed a job and place to stay' but when they got there they didn't have a job or place to stay. One group went half way around the world to find that the volunteer program they signed up for hadn't existed for over a year! BUT with all big companies dealing with hundreds of thousands of people a few mess ups is just going to happen. However, flat out lying or leading people on with false hope isn't something that should happen. I don't care how much money you want to make. Preying on the innocence of naive youth is just being a sh*t person/company. While this all seems so great and perfect, there's still downfalls to everything in life. Like getting homesick, or just regular sick, injuries, holidays away from family, missed birthdays, culture shock, the list goes on and on. It's up to me in the end to decide if the good outweighs the bad. I probably won't be able to afford it in the end so this is all just my wishful thinking. But that's life, you have to play the hand you're dealt. However staying positive about things can only help. If you can dream it, you can do it.

xoxo,
Wren

Photo: https://em.wattpad.com/3226e1378344c185472bfd808bf7977f71d6bcc6/687474703a2f2f6d7273676165756c2e636f6d2f77702d636f6e74656e742f75706c6f6164732f4769726c2d4c6f6f6b696e672d4f75742d6f662d57696e646f772e6a7067

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The past week or so I've really been looking into different colleges and universities. I'm currently enrolled in a local Community College but I want to transfer to a 4 year university and get a bachelor degree. At the moment I'm taking a math class, english class, and art class for a total of 10 credits (the math class is two parts 2 credits each while the other two are both 3 credits) and am enrolled under the cosmetology certification. But the thing is, cosmetology isn't really what I want to do with my life, at least not right now. I've narrowed it down some but yet at the same time I've added options. I originally was die hard into makeup and was good at hair so literally everyone told me to go to cosmetology school, so that's what I signed up for. However, over time my anxiety and depression stepped in and I just lost my ambition to do makeup and especially hair.

I looked into interior design because that's something I've always loved to do. When I was little I would draw my room on a piece of paper with a before and after. I would draw what it looked like at the time and then how I wanted it to look. I would show my mom and ask her if we could "redo" my room. Usually the answer was no but you can't blame a kid for trying, right? Hahaha Another thing that sounds super silly is the computer game the Sims. I always loved playing it and one day I was messing around and discovered you could move walls, change colors of the walls or floors, buy different furniture, and just customize it to your liking. From then on at least 85% of my time spent on the game was placing houses and then going in and redoing it all. If you've ever played the game you'll know that the people who make the houses usually don't have the greatest of taste, or maybe I'm just the one with odd tastes! Then I found out how to build the house from the foundation up. It became an obsession of mine and it went from 85% designing and building to 99%. I occasionally play it to this day.

The next degree option I've been looking into is American Sing Language to English Interpretation (ASLEI). This is another odd back story. So I was on Netflix one day and was desperately looking for a new show to binge watch. One of the recently added, like a new season, was Switched at Birth. I remember watching it when it first came out and I really liked it, I was just horrible at remembering to watch it ever week for the new episode. So I decided to start watching it again starting from the beginning. I fell in love with it and couldn't stop watching. Sign Language and the Deaf community fascinated me and I wanted to learn more. I downloaded an app called Marlee Signs where you learn basic signs. I haven't used it in a while but I love it and I just want to learn more. The Deaf community is misunderstood. Being Deaf doesn't have to be a set back or a struggle, they can do everything a hearing person can do. But there is a communication barrier between the deaf and the hearing. Whether it be in a hospital, in court, or even in school, there is a constant struggle with the two different ways of communicating. As an ASLEI I would fill that gap and help the communication. I've always wanted to do something that helps people and if learning a cool new language is a part of it that's great.

The only other degree path or paths is things to do with computers and the media. I've been looking into going to college in Europe next year and have found a few that I think I might like in Germany, Finland, and a couple other places. I'll make a post about that soon. The degrees I've mainly been looking into are called different things but are graphic design, interior design, game design, international business, and maritime management. So basically some creative things and some business things. Business is something you could say is a bit more "practical" or "realistic" but the designing would allow me to be creative in my everyday life but yet if I do the business route I might be more likely to post more on YouTube and here as that creative outlet. I really want to go to one of the schools I've looked into that are international, but it's a lot harder then when you just look into a college in your home country. There is so much more that you have to do but with free tuition and only having to pay living expenses, it might be worth it. I still have a lot more to look into and figure out, plus I still have to apply and see if I even get accepted at any of them, but I'll keep you all updated throughout this adventure.

If you have any suggestions, questions, or thoughts, leave me a comment and I'll get back to you as soon as possible. I'm still trying to figure my life out but it's great to have all you with me on this crazy journey! I can't wait to share more with you all.

xoxo,
Wren

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I haven't written a post in so long this feels foreign. Especially since I've always been crap at writing. How ironic, right? Anywho, where to start... It's been since last November that I posted anything. Since then A LOT has happened obviously. January 23 2015 was my last day of high school. After that I didn't really do much. I got a job at Walmart in April working in the back but it turned out to be too much for me so I had to quit. May 31st I had my graduation ceremony. (WooHoo!)

Then I didn't really have anything going on in my life. I don't remember when but late spring/early summer my family put our house up for sale. Two months later it SOLD! (That's fast in realty around here) So then my full time job was looking for a house. My mom is a teacher but she works a bit enrolling children over the summer for the fall to make some extra money and my dad is retired and doesn't know how to use a computer so I was really the only one helping to look. I have two older sisters but they didn't really care to help and just let me be the one to help our mom. We debated moving to bigger city or even all the way down to Tennessee because there just wasn't anything around here. Then my mom's coworker told her that her daughters neighbor, who lives in a small town about 10 miles south of us, just moved into assisted living and that his children were going to be selling the house. We looked at it but the basement wasn't finished and that was something we really wanted. While we were down there looking at it we saw two houses nearby for sale by owner. My mom called them both and set up times to look at them the first one was really nice and had the upstairs laundry my mom needs and also the finished basement but it was just too big of a house for us. The second one was it. It had the upstairs laundry, finished basement, nice two car garage (our previous home was only one car), lots of storage area and enough room for us all. We moved in August 14 and so far I'm liking it.

Then there's college... Since we moved just over the state bored into Illinois, I decided to go to a nearby community college and just take a few basic online classes this semester. I was going to do cosmetology but now I'm thinking of doing business. I want to do a bunch of different stuff but I'm too indecisive. I know I want to do something with makeup [keep reading for more on that ;)] but I also want something more "practical." I want to do Interior Design or American Sign Language to English Interpretation (ASLEI) but I need to take some ASL classes as prerequisites. Other times I even want to do Marine Biology because of my love for sharks and other marine life or something in the medical field. I'll most likely do one of the first two though. What sucks is since we just moved I have to pay out of state tuition which is $80 more per credit. I had to take money out of my savings to pay for my books and I still have some money owed for tuition and fees. To try and help pay for it all and help support my family I'm currently looking for a job. I had a lady from a Pizza Hut call and leave me a message to come in a get a background check to further the interview processes. I've also applied to a few stores and pretty much any place that I can. I'm really hoping that I get something soon. I need something to do to get out of the house and help support my family. Plus I'm trying to raise money to start my own makeup brand!

More about my makeup brand... I've recently really been dreaming about starting my own makeup brand and I'm trying to make it a reality and I need YOUR help! Like I said, I'm trying to save enough money to start up my own brand. I'm going to start off with lip products. I want to perfect a formula and product and then go from there. I'm not sure if I want to do lipsticks, or liquid lipsticks. Which do you like better?? Also, I'm not sure of what I wan't to call it. I REALLY want to call it Carousel Cosmetics but then I found a brand already named that :( I have a few other ideas but want to hear what you all think is a cool name for a makeup brand. I'm still trying to figure it all out but that's just part of it all. If you have any ideas or suggestions for me PLEASE feel free to leave it in the comments!

I've been really depressed and struggling with my anxiety. Just writing all of this out has been therapeutic for me. I really want to start doing more blog posts. I just don't know what about! Plus, due to my depression and anxiety I haven't been filming or uploading on my YouTube which really sucks because It's something I loved. I just recently lost my drive to do it. I filmed like three weeks ago and have edited a bit of the first half of a video but I just haven't been in the mood. Plus like a month ago I decided to do a DIY and refinish my night stand. My mom bugged me about it the other day and I exploded about it. I have anger issues and was on my period and I bottle everything up so that was the last straw. I couldn't deal. I hate to admit it but it's true and there is a LONG back story as to why I have these issues but that's for another post... Hopefully if I get a job that will help. I think a lot of it has to do with being at home too much and not going out and interacting with other humans. I don't know, I'm just crazy I guess.

If you've made it this far thank you and congrats! That's a lot of ranting/complaining to go through haha. Please let me know what you think about the things I mentioned! Your input is appreciated.

XOXO,

Wren

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